Defense Mechanisms in Men and Women

Reading Ken Corbett’s essay “Faggot=Loser: Phallic Narcissism as Defense” took me right back to my time in high school as many of my guy friends would always throw around the word “faggot.” Just as Corbett describes, they would use the word profusely, adding it into any sentence they could as if to make them sound manlier and therefore superior. In their minds, they were not insulting the gay community when using the word; “faggot” was merely a word that they used all the time and became apart of their basic vocabulary. It was just a word they used to protect themselves and put others down. But even if they weren’t aware of it, their loose use of the word was improper and insulting to the homosexual community.

As I continued to read the essay, I then began to think about how many girls in my high school also engaged in a similar defense mechanism by using words like “slut” or “whore.” Just as the guys in my high school called each other “faggot” in order to disassociate themselves from the negative image they believed the word fostered and place it on their friends instead, the girls did the same. In order to separate themselves from girls who were seen as trashy and desperate, many girls would call their friends “sluts.” By placing the term on others they believed they would be seen in a better light, as they thought it would allow themselves to be seen as classy and pure. It was also interesting to see how the word that women used in their defense mechanism is one that usually infers excessive indulgence in heterosexual behavior, while the one that men use is used to describe homosexual behavior. Thus, I thought it was very interesting to see the similar and differences in the defense mechanisms via language used by men and women.